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Thread: You know the old jokes about getting older and your prostate swelling,

  1. #1

    You know the old jokes about getting older and your prostate swelling,

    meaning you have to get up in the night to piss?

    I can't remember the last time I slept through the night. My prostate must be like a f˙cking watermelon.

  2. #2
    Quote Originally Posted by Sir C View Post
    meaning you have to get up in the night to piss?

    I can't remember the last time I slept through the night. My prostate must be like a f˙cking watermelon.
    I find keeping liquid intake to a minimum after around 9pm can make a big difference.

    But then, I'm about 20 years younger than you, not to mention significantly healthier and in better shape, so maybe you're beyond hope.

  3. #3
    Quote Originally Posted by Monty92 View Post
    I find keeping liquid intake to a minimum after around 9pm can make a big difference.

    But then, I'm about 20 years younger than you, not to mention significantly healthier and in better shape, so maybe you're beyond hope.
    I'm still in good enough shape to batter you to death with your mum's corpse.

  4. #4
    Quote Originally Posted by Sir C View Post
    I'm still in good enough shape to batter you to death with your mum's corpse.
    Presumably you'd render me semi-conscious so you can f*ck Maureen's corpse while I'm forced to watch before finishing me off, so to speak?

  5. #5
    Quote Originally Posted by Sir C View Post
    meaning you have to get up in the night to piss?

    I can't remember the last time I slept through the night. My prostate must be like a f˙cking watermelon.
    PSA test will sort you out one way or another. I've been pondering it, as it's *that* time of life when you're meant to get checked.
    Having recently seen first hand, a bunch of old chaps hopping around outside the radiotherapy suite, it can't do any harm.

  6. #6
    Quote Originally Posted by Sir C View Post
    meaning you have to get up in the night to piss?

    I can't remember the last time I slept through the night. My prostate must be like a f˙cking watermelon.
    Your doc is going to shove his arm, elbow deep, into you, sc
    ôOther clubs never came into my thoughts once I knew Arsenal wanted to sign me.ö

  7. #7
    Quote Originally Posted by Monty92 View Post
    I find keeping liquid intake to a minimum after around 9pm can make a big difference.

    But then, I'm about 20 years younger than you, not to mention significantly healthier and in better shape, so maybe you're beyond hope.
    You sound like a f˙cking homo all the same.

    Liquid intake to a minimum after 9pm ffs.

  8. #8
    Quote Originally Posted by Sir C View Post
    meaning you have to get up in the night to piss?

    I can't remember the last time I slept through the night. My prostate must be like a f˙cking watermelon.
    Could be Sleep Apnea.

    Lack of a deep sleep contributes to a lack of oxygen, which causes your kidneys to tense up, which increases the urge to pee. I had this issue about three years ago, was diagnosed, and now am on a CPAP machine. Now I frequently sleep through the night, many times waking up in the morning in the same position I started!

    Before, I had the unavoidable desire to nod off at all times of the day, including around 9:00am. Nowadays seven hours of sleep has me refreshed. Changed my life.

  9. #9
    Quote Originally Posted by 7sisters View Post
    PSA test will sort you out one way or another. I've been pondering it, as it's *that* time of life when you're meant to get checked.
    Having recently seen first hand, a bunch of old chaps hopping around outside the radiotherapy suite, it can't do any harm.
    My doctor told me he was going to check my prostate once and I agreed.

    Never, ever again. I swear he shoved a wardrobe up my fundament.

    I'll take the cancer thanks.

  10. #10
    Quote Originally Posted by IUFG View Post
    Your doc is going to shove his arm, elbow deep, into you, sc
    I can assure you he isn't, i.

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