Is your partner aggressively tickling you in their sleep a sackable offence?

[Monty92]

Why would she want to do that?

Oh hang on, this is about me being a ****, isn’t it.

Maybe she is trying to hurt you in her sleep?

[Rich]

He pulled his finger out of your árse and then poked you in the face with it?

That's, like, gross, dude.

Note the use of the word ‘attenpted’.

[Sir C]

Note the use of the word ‘attenpted’.

Yes yes, we'ver heard all that nonsense before.

He was up to the elbow, wasn't he? You were basically his glove puppet.

Back in 5.

[Alberto Balsam Rodriguez]

Why would she want to do that?

Oh hang on, this is about me being a ****, isn’t it.

Having read that diary she keeps of you, you can understand why one might come to that conclusion.