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Thread: Decent article from the Tele on why everything is so much better under Unai

  1. #21
    Quote Originally Posted by Monty92 View Post
    If someone killed your (albeit nagging and past her prime) wife of 22 years and the next day dumped some random bint on your doorstep and said "Here, live with her. And have sex with her tonight. Come on, forget the last two decades, life goes on, just do it" .....would you be happy, even if she was a bit of a looker with three wafer cups under her knickers?
    So you get rid of the first wife, who you have wanted to get rid of for years and who you secretly hoped would leave you in order to save you the hassle, and in return you get a new younger model with new ideas and practices.

    Win win in my book.

    The killing bit is excessive, that I grant you. Though nob

  2. #22
    Quote Originally Posted by Monty92 View Post
    Yes, and a touch younger, not a grey hair in sight, and has actually managed to win a European ****ing trophy. But it's not your soulmate and life partner, who is now dead.

    What do you do?
    I think a better analogy is that your mum and dad split up and with undue haste she takes up with a new fella who barely speaks English. He makes her happy, the household's running more smoothly and the rows have stopped, but still and all he's not your dad, is he? He's just some cvnt who's turned up and is knobbing your mum. Your dad, meanwhile, is in Totteridge, alone and staring out the window.

  3. #23
    Quote Originally Posted by Peter View Post
    Er, oh, um, yes, I would be absolutely furious! What a dreadful thought......
    And this one's not a vegan.

  4. #24
    Quote Originally Posted by SWv2 View Post
    So you get rid of the first wife, who you have wanted to get rid of for years and who you secretly hoped would leave you in order to save you the hassle, and in return you get a new younger model with new ideas and practices.

    Win win in my book.

    The killing bit is excessive, that I grant you. Though nob
    But I didn't want to get rid of the first wife, though. She was my soulmate. Sure, the sex had become infrequent and I was often reduced to masturbating in the bathroom, but that doesn't mean I stopped loving her for a second. And there was the occasional wild night too when she'd keep the spark alive by letting me stick it in her bum (win the FA Cup).

    You talk as if we lived entirely separate lives when it was a perfectly functional relationship

  5. #25
    Quote Originally Posted by Monty92 View Post
    But I didn't want to get rid of the first wife, though. She was my soulmate. Sure, the sex had become infrequent and I was often reduced to masturbating in the bathroom, but that doesn't mean I stopped loving her for a second. And there was the occasional wild night too when she'd keep the spark alive by letting me stick it in her bum (win the FA Cup).

    You talk as if we lived entirely separate lives when it was a perfectly functional relationship
    Hang on. If the FA Cup is anal, what's winning the Champion's League?

  6. #26
    Quote Originally Posted by Burney View Post
    Hang on. If the FA Cup is anal, what's winning the Champion's League?
    keep, the lights on
    Northern Monkey ... who can't upload a bleeding Avatar

  7. #27
    Quote Originally Posted by Monty92 View Post
    Yes, and a touch younger, not a grey hair in sight, and has actually managed to win a European ****ing trophy. But it's not your soulmate and life partner, who is now dead.

    What do you do?
    I peer mournfully at my shrivelled, flaccid member, like a dessicated prawn hanging dead from a fence, and remember...

  8. #28
    Quote Originally Posted by Burney View Post
    I think a better analogy is that your mum and dad split up and with undue haste she takes up with a new fella who barely speaks English. He makes her happy, the household's running more smoothly and the rows have stopped, but still and all he's not your dad, is he? He's just some cvnt who's turned up and is knobbing your mum. Your dad, meanwhile, is in Totteridge, alone and staring out the window.
    But in that scenario I could presumably still go and live with my dad (what with him living alone in an 8-bedroom detached house n'all) if I so wished.

  9. #29
    Quote Originally Posted by Burney View Post
    Hang on. If the FA Cup is anal, what's winning the Champion's League?
    Fck knows, but I wouldn't recommend googling it at work.

  10. #30
    Quote Originally Posted by Monty92 View Post
    But in that scenario I could presumably still go and live with my dad (what with him living alone in an 8-bedroom detached house n'all) if I so wished.
    Nah. She's got custody and you're a minor.

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