I have an old friend whose wife

[Herbert Augustus Chapman]

My word, I am reminded of the time I was discovered by the glw, naked on a hotel bed, drinking scotch whisky from a toothmug and eating Co-Op cocktail sausages whilst watchign Gareth Malone coach a choir of disableds, weeping uncontrollably.

Possibly my finest hour.

And masturbating vigorously no doubt