Off to do something stupid in a minute. After my violent food poisoning on Saturday

[AFC East]

I had an acquaintance who, on farting, belching, coughing something up, having taken a particularly foul dump or puking would gravely intone 'Better an empty house than a bad lodger' as though this expiated all sins.

Needless to say, he was northern.

For a mere acquaintance you've shared some very intimate situations. I dread to think how close you get to a genuine friend!

[Burney]

For a mere acquaintance you've shared some very intimate situations. I dread to think how close you get to a genuine friend!

I lived with him at University. On one famous occasion he was so proud of a dump that he'd taken that he refused to flush it until we'd all seen it. These were the days before cameraphones, so we were all expected to troop in there and wonder at his monstrous log.

I quite liked him, but I'm not sure he was fully human.

[Sir C]

I lived with him at University. On one famous occasion he was so proud of a dump that he'd taken that he refused to flush it until we'd all seen it. These were the days before cameraphones, so we were all expected to troop in there and wonder at his monstrous log.

I quite liked him, but I'm not sure he was fully human.

I told you about my good chum's 18th birthday, I believe? So píssed did we make him that I feared for his life, so I accompanied him to his room (this was at school) and climbed into bed with him, determined to save him from choking on his won sick. Waking in the middle of the night and wandering about the dreadful smell, I soon realised that he had shít himself and covered us both in it. The remarkable thing was how far the shít had travelled. It was in my hair, for fúck's sake.

I had to wake people up to help drag him to the shower without waking the housemaster who was a right horrible ****.

[WES]

I'd go with the egg, tbh. Listeria, probably. Salmonella, even? All in all, an excellent aid to weight loss.

See also pneumonia. I was off for two weeks with it during which the sun shone almost constantly. I lay in my garden coughing/sleeping for two weeks as it wore off.

When I got back to work I had a nice tan and was a stone lighter. Everyone kept telling me how good I looked and asked where I'd been,

[Burney]

I told you about my good chum's 18th birthday, I believe? So píssed did we make him that I feared for his life, so I accompanied him to his room (this was at school) and climbed into bed with him, determined to save him from choking on his won sick. Waking in the middle of the night and wandering about the dreadful smell, I soon realised that he had shít himself and covered us both in it. The remarkable thing was how far the shít had travelled. It was in my hair, for fúck's sake.

I had to wake people up to help drag him to the shower without waking the housemaster who was a right horrible ****.

Yes. Although I can't help but feel you rather zoomed past the bit where you climbed into bed with a hopelessly drunk adolescent boy there, tbh.

[AFC East]

I lived with him at University. On one famous occasion he was so proud of a dump that he'd taken that he refused to flush it until we'd all seen it. These were the days before cameraphones, so we were all expected to troop in there and wonder at his monstrous log.

I quite liked him, but I'm not sure he was fully human.

Sounds a blast, as long as you didn't live with him :-/

[Sir C]

Yes. Although I can't help but feel you rather zoomed past the bit where you climbed into bed with a hopelessly drunk adolescent boy there, tbh.

You closet heems see sexytime everywhere, b.

I was píssed. There was one bed

[Burney]

You closet heems see sexytime everywhere, b.

I was píssed. There was one bed

I once p1ssed the bed while sharing it with a chum, to be fair. My first attempt at drinking whisky. We were about 16. He was very good about it, in fairness. Tony Lark, his name was.

[Peter]

I once p1ssed the bed while sharing it with a chum, to be fair. My first attempt at drinking whisky. We were about 16. He was very good about it, in fairness. Tony Lark, his name was.

THis is without question the most revolting thread I have ever seen on here.

[Burney]

THis is without question the most revolting thread I have ever seen on here.

There's nothing revolting about natural bodily functions, p, you old puritan.