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Thread: Anyway, on to other matters. To wit, camping.

  1. #11
    Quote Originally Posted by Sir C View Post
    I have camped across half of east Africa, you silly man.
    Campest person on here
    Northern Monkey ... who can't upload a bleeding Avatar

  2. #12
    Quote Originally Posted by Burney View Post
    Well if you say so. But I’m sure you can appreciate the concern of a friend that a gentleman of your gravity and social status might be discovered squatting behind a bush, coiling down a monstrous turd prior to wiping your arse with a lump of moss.
    Happily, my excellent diet ensures that my waste products are of a manageable size and carry no displeasing aromas.

    I would contend that extruding large turds is a sign of coarse breeding.

  3. #13
    Quote Originally Posted by Sir C View Post
    I have camped across half of east Africa, you silly man.
    East Africa? Piece 'o piss man! Come and talk to me when you've wild camped among lethal crocodiles in the Northern Territories as I have.*

    *Possibly not a shred of truth in that.

  4. #14
    Quote Originally Posted by Sir C View Post
    I yearn to be at one with nature and, to this end, have decided to take up wild camping. There is a particular spot up by Angle Tarn at which I am determind to watch the sun set, frying sausages over a wood fire. But I overtake myself. In order to learn the secrets of camping I have purchased some equipment with which I will practise in teh garden: a tent, two sleeping bags and two bed rolls. The total cost of these items? £83.

    That's value, that is.
    I have always found the camping experience to be enhanced hugely by magic mushrooms.

    I doubt you will take my advice.

  5. #15
    Quote Originally Posted by Herbert Augustus Chapman View Post
    East Africa? Piece 'o piss man! Come and talk to me when you've wild camped among lethal crocodiles in the Northern Territories as I have.*

    *Possibly not a shred of truth in that.
    Are you suggesting there are no crocodiles in east Africa?

  6. #16
    Quote Originally Posted by Sir C View Post
    I yearn to be at one with nature and, to this end, have decided to take up wild camping. There is a particular spot up by Angle Tarn at which I am determind to watch the sun set, frying sausages over a wood fire. But I overtake myself. In order to learn the secrets of camping I have purchased some equipment with which I will practise in teh garden: a tent, two sleeping bags and two bed rolls. The total cost of these items? £83.

    That's value, that is.
    I have successfully erected the tent. It's yooge!

    Word to the wise. When seeking quality camping equipment, don't go to Argos.

  7. #17
    Quote Originally Posted by Sir C View Post
    I have successfully erected the tent. It's yooge!

    Word to the wise. When seeking quality camping equipment, don't go to Argos.
    Mandatory 'Your first successful erection in a decade' witticism.

  8. #18
    Quote Originally Posted by Pokster View Post
    Campest person on here
    Camper than a row of tents
    “Other clubs never came into my thoughts once I knew Arsenal wanted to sign me.”

  9. #19
    Quote Originally Posted by Burney View Post
    Mandatory 'Your first successful erection in a decade' witticism.
    It smells of plastic. The tumescent tent. Hot plastic

  10. #20
    Quote Originally Posted by Sir C View Post
    Are you suggesting there are no crocodiles in east Africa?
    The crocodiles of East Africa are notoriously effete c. One need only mention Australian salt water crocodiles to them and they become tearful and frightened. Glorified alligators!

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