I need to sell my house and it is pretty ****ing ****

[Peter]

Any tips?

[Luis Anaconda]

Any tips?

I'd probably word the advert a bit differently, p. Honesty is good but that may be a bit too far

[Peter]

I'd probably word the advert a bit differently, p. Honesty is good but that may be a bit too far

I dont want to waste people's time

I suppose I could tidy up a bit. THat might help.

[Viva Prat Vegas]

Festoon the bathroom with fresh towels

Heat up some cinnamon on the stove to give the property a baked bread aroma

[WES]

I'd probably word the advert a bit differently, p. Honesty is good but that may be a bit too far

How about 'Sh1t house owned by a failed hippy now for sale. The house is almost as sh1t as the price I'm asking for it. What more do you want?'.

[IUFG]

I dont want to waste people's time

I suppose I could tidy up a bit. THat might help.

".....with scope for improvement." are the words you want, p.

I'll email you my invoice.

[Ash]

Any tips?

Have you tried papering over the cracks?

Worked for Arsene for years.

[Peter]

Have you tried papering over the cracks?

Worked for Arsene for years.

I did, literally, try that with one of the internal doors. The results were no more impressive than Arsene's

Nobody in their right mind is going to buy this ****hole.

[Peter]

How about 'Sh1t house owned by a failed hippy now for sale. The house is almost as sh1t as the price I'm asking for it. What more do you want?'.

I am not a failed hippy. Over the years I have proved rather good at being a hippy.

[WES]

I am not a failed hippy. Over the years I have proved rather good at being a hippy.

I didn't think hippies were supposed to own houses of any sort. Nor a Rover for that matter. The cat is fine, I suppose.