Recruiting for a job and I'm struck by the ineptitude of graduate CVs.

[Peter]

It does sometimes feel like the backlash against rote learning has simply resulted in them not learning anything.

I had to correct a junior yesterday (English graduate) because she said 'You and I' when she should have said 'You and me' and said 'amount' when she should have said 'number' in the space of a minute.

She seemed outraged by the 'You and I' thing. She said 'I was always taught it was right to say 'You and I'!'

It stems from failing to teach grammar at school. And maths.

I went to an outstanding school and we were never tasught much about grammar, punctuation etc. My mum taught me all that.

The you and I thing isnt difficult to grasp. You just use the one you would use if the other person wasn't there. Ie He gave it to me/he gave it to Dave and me.

I spend much of my day correcting reports written by my team. Some of them are appalling.

[Burney]

It stems from failing to teach grammar at school. And maths.

I went to an outstanding school and we were never tasught much about grammar, punctuation etc. My mum taught me all that.

The you and I thing isnt difficult to grasp. You just use the one you would use if the other person wasn't there. Ie He gave it to me/he gave it to Dave and me.

I spend much of my day correcting reports written by my team. Some of them are appalling.

I know. I had to explain the passive voice to someone the other day. I ended up explaining it as I would to a child by saying that, if they appended the phrase 'by monkeys' to the end of the sentence and it still made sense, it was the passive voice and if they added it and it didn't make sense, it was in the active voice. There was no point talking about subjects and objects because they just don't understand the terms and switch off when you use them.

They now all think I'm some sort of pedantic old grammar Nazi of course (and they may not be entirely wrong) but, as I pointed out to one the other day, they work with the written word and it is actually my job to make sure they know how to use it correctly.

[Tony C]

The funniest bit was during the course we had to like write down anonymously where people are deemed not to be emotionally intelligent so we can discuss it further and help each other.

Some a hole wrote -

Tony would be working and then go for a smoke without inviting anyone and then when he’s outside he smokes by himself with his headphones on. He also goes for lunch and doesn’t invite anyone else.

-

Wtf how can someone get upset by this. I take care of business and then prefer to relax on my own rather than listen to someone else’s boring life. Also I’m not going to advertise that I’m popping into Ladbrokes for lunch am I ffs

[Billy Goat Sverige]

One girl lists under Key Skills 'Journalist for Fandom Wikia' (????), as well as 'Emotional intelligence' and
'Passionate Cosplayer and Pop Culture enthusiast' (????????).

Meanwhile, straight after claiming she has 'Keen attention to detail', she says she has 'Exceptional skills in Microsoft Office and Abode Systems'

This girl has an MA and has spent five years in higher education.

Another genius felt the need to tell me his 'Ethnic background' was 'Caucasion' and list his 'Religion' as 'None'.
Yet another applied for a job in journalism and gave as the first line in his application 'I am looking for a job to further a career in computing/software development'.

I despair.

“Exceptional skills in Microsoft Office” They all write that and most probably wouldn’t know how to format a cell in Excel.

[PSRB]

I know. I had to explain the passive voice to someone the other day. I ended up explaining it as I would to a child by saying that, if they appended the phrase 'by monkeys' to the end of the sentence and it still made sense, it was the passive voice and if they added it and it didn't make sense, it was in the active voice. There was no point talking about subjects and objects because they just don't understand the terms and switch off when you use them.

They now all think I'm some sort of pedantic old grammar Nazi of course (and they may not be entirely wrong) but, as I pointed out to one the other day, they work with the written word and it is actually my job to make sure they know how to use it correctly.

I saw that '....by monkeys' thing on Twitter this morning, very handy.

[Burney]

The funniest bit was during the course we had to like write down anonymously where people are deemed not to be emotionally intelligent so we can discuss it further and help each other.

Some a hole wrote -

Tony would be working and then go for a smoke without inviting anyone and then when he’s outside he smokes by himself with his headphones on. He also goes for lunch and doesn’t invite anyone else.

-

Wtf how can someone get upset by this. I take care of business and then prefer to relax on my own rather than listen to someone else’s boring life. Also I’m not going to advertise that I’m popping into Ladbrokes for lunch am I ffs

Some people seem to think that it is their right to have you like them, t.

[Burney]

I saw that '....by monkeys' thing on Twitter this morning, very handy.

I was taught it 30-something years ago. It certainly works - much like the method p describes for remembering the 'You and I/You and me thing.

The thing that people who just think I'm a grammar nazi don't get is that, once you learn these things, it actually hurts your soul when you hear them misused. If I hear someone say amount when they mean number, describe a company as a plural or say less when they mean fewer, it's like nails down a blackboard for me.

[PSRB]

I was taught it 30-something years ago. It certainly works - much like the method p describes for remembering the 'You and I/You and me thing.

The thing that people who just think I'm a grammar nazi don't get is that, once you learn these things, it actually hurts your soul when you hear them misused. If I hear someone say amount when they mean number, describe a company as a plural or say less when they mean fewer, it's like nails down a blackboard for me.

Tesco and Tescos, does my head in.
Look at the bloody sign, does it say 'Tescos'....no, it bloody doesn't!!

[Burney]

Tesco and Tescos, does my head in.
Look at the bloody sign, does it say 'Tescos'....no, it bloody doesn't!!

I would put people who say 'mischiev-ee-ous' rather than 'mischievous' in camps until they learn to stop doing it.

I mean there is literally no justification for adding the extra syllable. Why do they do this?

[Alberto Balsam Rodriguez]

One girl lists under Key Skills 'Journalist for Fandom Wikia' (????), as well as 'Emotional intelligence' and
'Passionate Cosplayer and Pop Culture enthusiast' (????????).

Meanwhile, straight after claiming she has 'Keen attention to detail', she says she has 'Exceptional skills in Microsoft Office and Abode Systems'

This girl has an MA and has spent five years in higher education.

Another genius felt the need to tell me his 'Ethnic background' was 'Caucasion' and list his 'Religion' as 'None'.
Yet another applied for a job in journalism and gave as the first line in his application 'I am looking for a job to further a career in computing/software development'.

I despair.

Ah the yoot of today. I bet this is how our parent's generation spoke about us when we were all fresh out of college applying for jobs? I can't imagine anyone of the Generation Xers putting "emotional intelligence" into a CV though?

Of course, they did it down the pub, not online.