Talking of supermarkets, what fresh cvntery is this?

[Sir C]

For the best results presumably Sir moistens the end before inserting

You dirty, dirty man s.

You have PM.

[Rich]

There is much, much worse news than this. There are plans, it is alleged, to ban God's honest cotton bud!

I shall be reduced to poking around in my lugs with a paperclip or biro. Haha, which reminds me of a colleagure, many years ago, who made the error of picking up a pen from my desk and thoughtfully chewing the end, only to throw it down in disgust with a cry of, "This fúcking thing is covered in your ear bogies!"

Did you see the photograph of a seahorse with a cotton bud (link below). It broke my heart a little bit.

So in short, sod your cotton buds.

https://www.google.com/search?q=sea+...JWn-_y8KwNN0M:

[Burney]

"Once trained, shop assistants will advise and direct customers who ask towards healthier choices"

Don't really see the problem....if you are having to ask for advice in a supermarket you are pretty ****ed.

I would direct the honourable gentleman to this sentence: "For example a shopper deciding on a meal to cook for supper might be advised to buy quinoa instead of rice, Waitrose said."

Apart from being the most middle class sentence ever, what is actually intended is that the customer should be guilted into buying something about eight times more expensive than rice under the guise of pretending to care about their health.

Mind you, one could while away an amusing afternoon in Waitrose by taking things like pork pies, Sunny Delight, sausage rolls and lard up to shop assistants and asking them to suggest healthy alternatives.

[Peter]

"Excuse me, I'm a fat **** and can't decide whether this broccolli or this lard would make for the healthier dinner, plus my children are malnourished which is the fault of evil Tories."

That's the sort of thing I'm imagining.

Yes, but what are they doing in a Waitrose? They should be directed to Asda who have a much broader and cheaper range of frozen pizzas, mega boxes of crisps and sausages that, for content reasons, have to be called bangers. THey also provide a mobility scooter for customers who are so fat that they cannot walk round a supermarket.

[Burney]

For the best results presumably Sir moistens the end before inserting

I believe that's simply good manners, s.

[PSRB]

"Excuse me, I'm a fat **** and can't decide whether this broccolli or this lard would make for the healthier dinner, plus my children are malnourished which is the fault of evil Tories."

That's the sort of thing I'm imagining.

I doubt lefties use Waitrose

[Burney]

Did you see the photograph of a seahorse with a cotton bud (link below). It broke my heart a little bit.

So in short, sod your cotton buds.

https://www.google.com/search?q=sea+...JWn-_y8KwNN0M:

I think it looks cool. He looks really proud of his cotton bud. I bet all the other seahorses are envious of him.

[Burney]

I doubt lefties use Waitrose

Rich lefties do.

[Peter]

I would direct the honourable gentleman to this sentence: "For example a shopper deciding on a meal to cook for supper might be advised to buy quinoa instead of rice, Waitrose said."

Apart from being the most middle class sentence ever, what is actually intended is that the customer should be guilted into buying something about eight times more expensive than rice under the guise of pretending to care about their health.

Mind you, one could while away an amusing afternoon in Waitrose by taking things like pork pies, Sunny Delight, sausage rolls and lard up to shop assistants and asking them to suggest healthy alternatives.

THere is a Waitrose just 300 yards from me. I will be availing myself of this service as soon as possible.

Quinoa is absolutely, ****ing revolting.

[Rich]

I think it looks cool. He looks really proud of his cotton bud. I bet all the other seahorses are envious of him.