Golf. Various poorly-dressed, largely indistinguishable Americans competing to see who can hit a ball about in the least interesting fashion while crowds whoop for no discernible reason until it finally stops.
GET IN THE HOLE!!!!
As your mum often says.
When I was young and full of rage
I hated Tottenham to the core
But now I've reached a gentler age
I hate the fùckers even more.