Click here for Arsenal FC news and reports

Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 28

Thread: Just watched the woman from accross the way take twenty minutes to get her car

  1. #1

    Just watched the woman from across the way take twenty minutes to get her car

    moving. Took her that long to realise her wheels were just spinning.

    Got herself up to about 20 MPH on the solid ice, completely oblivious to the fact a slight touch of her break would simply send her into a 50 yard, uncontrollable skid.

    How can someone be so cancer deservingly, ****holingly fúcking thick? :monty-style-rant:
    Last edited by Herbert Augustus Chapman; 12-12-2017 at 11:14 AM.

  2. #2
    Quote Originally Posted by Herbert Augustus Chapman View Post
    moving. Took her that long to realise her wheels were just spinning.

    Got herself up to about 20 MPH on the solid ice, completely oblivious to the fact a slight touch of her break would simply send her into a 50 yard, uncontrollable skid.

    How can someone be so cancer deservingly, ****holingly fúcking thick? :monty-style-rant:
    People who learnt to drive within the last 15 or 20 years have been dramatically short-changed, h. Never having known a vehicle without ABS, radial tyres, disc brakes and traction control means they never developed any sort of feeling for the process of controlling the car; they are simply able to point the thing in the direction they want to go and use the stop and go pedals. On the very rare occasion that road conditions make the process a little more interactive, they're fúcked.

    It's a shame, is what it is.

  3. #3
    Quote Originally Posted by Herbert Augustus Chapman View Post
    moving. Took her that long to realise her wheels were just spinning.

    Got herself up to about 20 MPH on the solid ice, completely oblivious to the fact a slight touch of her break would simply send her into a 50 yard, uncontrollable skid.

    How can someone be so cancer deservingly, ****holingly fúcking thick? :monty-style-rant:
    My favourites are the ones who don't understand why their rear-wheel-drive cars are all over the option when there's a bit of snow and ice. As long as your car/loved ones are nowhere in the vicinity of these dangerous lunatics, it can actually be very funny watching their efforts.

  4. #4
    Quote Originally Posted by Sir C View Post
    People who learnt to drive within the last 15 or 20 years have been dramatically short-changed, h. Never having known a vehicle without ABS, radial tyres, disc brakes and traction control means they never developed any sort of feeling for the process of controlling the car; they are simply able to point the thing in the direction they want to go and use the stop and go pedals. On the very rare occasion that road conditions make the process a little more interactive, they're fúcked.

    It's a shame, is what it is.
    And when she mows down a gaggle of blameless little children waiting at the bus stop, she'll shrug her shoulders and say "It wasn't my fault. The brakes just didn't work."

    She's a ****, is what she is.

  5. #5
    Quote Originally Posted by Sir C View Post
    People who learnt to drive within the last 15 or 20 years have been dramatically short-changed, h. Never having known a vehicle without ABS, radial tyres, disc brakes and traction control means they never developed any sort of feeling for the process of controlling the car; they are simply able to point the thing in the direction they want to go and use the stop and go pedals. On the very rare occasion that road conditions make the process a little more interactive, they're fúcked.

    It's a shame, is what it is.
    for example. I've never had a punctured tyre before and now I am stressed out like some pansy.

  6. #6
    Quote Originally Posted by Sir C View Post
    People who learnt to drive within the last 15 or 20 years have been dramatically short-changed, h. Never having known a vehicle without ABS, radial tyres, disc brakes and traction control means they never developed any sort of feeling for the process of controlling the car; they are simply able to point the thing in the direction they want to go and use the stop and go pedals. On the very rare occasion that road conditions make the process a little more interactive, they're fúcked.

    It's a shame, is what it is.
    But the infantilisation of the driver has been a process the car industry has encouraged - indeed, striven towards - for decades. This is because most road accidents are the fault of the sack of meat behind the wheel and reducing their input in the process does actually cut the number of RTAs.

  7. #7
    Quote Originally Posted by Herbert Augustus Chapman View Post
    And when she mows down a gaggle of blameless little children waiting at the bus stop, she'll shrug her shoulders and say "It wasn't my fault. The brakes just didn't work."

    She's a ****, is what she is.
    Anyone who has ever spent time on a bus with schoolchildren knows that the little fückers are anything but blameless.

  8. #8
    Quote Originally Posted by Burney View Post
    But the infantilisation of the driver has been a process the car industry has encouraged - indeed, striven towards - for decades. This is because most road accidents are the fault of the sack of meat behind the wheel and reducing their input in the process does actually cut the number of RTAs.
    Oh, you're absolutely right, and the improvement in the safety, efficiency and comfort of motor vehicles is entirely laudable and nigh on miraculous. I just think it would be better if people learnt to drive on a 1973 Ford Escort Popular, then got to appreciate a modern vehicle, equipped with a much better understanding of the car and with the skills to truly control the vehicle.

    Obviously such a thing is never going to happen. Where the fúck would we find a load of 1973 Ford Escorts, for Christ's sake. I'm just saying, like.

  9. #9
    Quote Originally Posted by Pat Vegas View Post
    for example. I've never had a punctured tyre before and now I am stressed out like some pansy.
    Yes. Of course people like you should be forced to learn to change a tyre in the pissing rain at the side of a motorway in February. You should be taught to break down in the snow whilst on your way to a job interview, leaving you to check HT leads, remove the distributor cap, change the condensor, gap the points, remove the plugs and clean them and gap them... all of this would show you how piss easy you've got it.

  10. #10
    Quote Originally Posted by Pat Vegas View Post
    for example. I've never had a punctured tyre before and now I am stressed out like some pansy.
    Rugged, manly types like Sir C and I simply roll up our sleeves to expose our beefy forearms and change the fecking tyre ourselves. Any women watching become profoundly moist at the sight of it.

    Fops like Berni call the AA and do a 'damsel in distress' routine then sit there filing their nails for four hours waiting for the real man to turn up and change it for them.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •