Talking of celebratory dinner wrongness.....

[Sir C]

But I would have to fly my mother or one of my sisters over to cook it. That's the complicated bit

I am sure that a renaissance man such as yourself is well capable of knocking up a roast dinner, la.

[Pokster]

But I would have to fly my mother or one of my sisters over to cook it. That's the complicated bit

And your mum's quite busy being roasted herself

[Burney]

Yes, but it's a bit foreign, isn't it? It's not a decent English roast.

No. The Germans also have a very unfortunate habit of sometimes simply presenting one with a huge and frankly off-putting lump of mea, which is antithetical to the roast.

[Sir C]

No. The Germans also have a very unfortunate habit of sometimes simply presenting one with a huge and frankly off-putting lump of mea, which is antithetical to the roast.

You find the Schweinshaxe 'off-putting'? It's nothing to do with a roast, granted, but it is a magnificent other thing entirely.

Indeed, a 'haxe with sauerkraut and Kartoffelsalat might be one of the finest lunches available in mainland Europe.

[Burney]

You find the Schweinshaxe 'off-putting'? It's nothing to do with a roast, granted, but it is a magnificent other thing entirely.

Indeed, a 'haxe with sauerkraut and Kartoffelsalat might be one of the finest lunches available in mainland Europe.

it is undeniably an unsettling-looking thing, I think. And, when all's said and done, it's just an unadorned lump of pork. One has to be in the right mood to grapple with it.

[Rich]

Surely you can buy a chicken there, la, or a rib of beef? And lard must be available, Christ on a bike there must be gallons of rendered pork fat produced in Munich every day.

I'm going 1 x beef and 1 x duck this year. Re: the beef - what should I be asking my butcher for?

[Burney]

I'm going 1 x beef and 1 x duck this year. Re: the beef - what should I be asking my butcher for?

A chined rib, obviously.

1 duck won't go around many people.

[Sir C]

I'm going 1 x beef and 1 x duck this year. Re: the beef - what should I be asking my butcher for?

You want a rib of beef. A minimum of 4 bones.

However, I would advise defenestrating the duck and replacing it with God's own honest goose.

[Sir C]

A chined rib, obviously.

1 duck won't go around many people.

Oh I wouldn't chine it. The crispy tendony bits on the bones are the perfect chef's treat whilst carving.

[Rich]

You want a rib of beef. A minimum of 4 bones.

However, I would advise defenestrating the duck and replacing it with God's own honest goose.

Can I comfortably feed five with 4 bones of rib? Not really sure how much meat comes on a beef rib, to be honest.