8 days of undulterated bliss in the United Arab Emirates

[World's End Stella]

are now over and all I have to show for it is this wonderful tan and a liver in need of repair.

Other than the wonderful memories of laying in the salt water of the Gulf of Oman whilst gazing at the Al Hajar mountains, refreshing swims with my wife and children in the quite wonderful pool, the endless array of pints, cocktails and bubbly, the magnificence of the burrata at the Italian restaurant, the genius of the roast duck at the Asian restaurant, the mouth watering steaks at the Gonu Bar overlooking the Gulf of Oman and the general bonhomie with the families whom we met and enjoyed many meals and discussions, of course.

'Ave that you Dutch Paddy c*nt

[Sir C]

are now over and all I have to show for it is this wonderful tan and a liver in need of repair.

Other than the wonderful memories of laying in the salt water of the Gulf of Oman whilst gazing at the Al Hajar mountains, refreshing swims with my wife and children in the quite wonderful pool, the endless array of pints, cocktails and bubbly, the magnificence of the burrata at the Italian restaurant, the genius of the roast duck at the Asian restaurant, the mouth watering steaks at the Gonu Bar overlooking the Gulf of Oman and the general bonhomie with the families whom we met and enjoyed many meals and discussions, of course.

'Ave that you Dutch Paddy c*nt

You have clearly broadened your cultural horizons and I salute you, w. I mean, schlepping to the middle east to feast on the same food you eat in London and lying in a pond of chlorine and urine is proper David Livingstone stuff.

Now that you're a seasoned traveller, you could try somewhere really exotic next year, like Magaluf.

[World's End Stella]

You have clearly broadened your cultural horizons and I salute you, w. I mean, schlepping to the middle east to feast on the same food you eat in London and lying in a pond of chlorine and urine is proper David Livingstone stuff.

Now that you're a seasoned traveller, you could try somewhere really exotic next year, like Magaluf.

You know, I thought of you once on holiday, Charles.

One of the women who has been there many times mentioned a very expensive hotel in Dubai that they had attended instead one year. She hated it as the food was awful and the clientele largely consisted of anti-social snobs who went there mostly to reaffirm in their own minds how rich and sophisticated they must be in order to afford it.

It was at that point that I thought of you.

[Sir C]

You know, I thought of you once on holiday, Charles.

One of the women who has been there many times mentioned a very expensive hotel in Dubai that they had attended instead one year. She hated it as the food was awful and the clientele largely consisted of anti-social snobs who went there mostly to reaffirm in their own minds how rich and sophisticated they must be in order to afford it.

It was at that point that I thought of you.

I thought of you when I saw a dog poo on the pavement.*

Plus, your mum.

*I didn't see a dog poo on the pavement.

[Burney]

You know, I thought of you once on holiday, Charles.

One of the women who has been there many times mentioned a very expensive hotel in Dubai that they had attended instead one year. She hated it as the food was awful and the clientele largely consisted of anti-social snobs who went there mostly to reaffirm in their own minds how rich and sophisticated they must be in order to afford it.

It was at that point that I thought of you.

Anyone who holidays in Dubai is in no position to feel snobbish about anything, though

It is a vulgar, ugly, ghastly place for vulgar, ugly, ghastly people

[World's End Stella]

Anyone who holidays in Dubai is in no position to feel snobbish about anything, though

It is a vulgar, ugly, ghastly place for vulgar, ugly, ghastly people

That would be a relevant point if I had actually holidayed in Dubai.

But I didn't.

[Sir C]

That would be a relevant point if I had actually holidayed in Dubai.

But I didn't.

You didn't venture 500 metres to Abu Dhabi, did you? You absolute explorer, you!

[Burney]

That would be a relevant point if I had actually holidayed in Dubai.

But I didn't.

You mentioned someone talking about people in Dubai being snobbish about it, you poltroon!

[IUFG]

Anyone who holidays in Dubai is in no position to feel snobbish about anything, though

It is a vulgar, ugly, ghastly place for vulgar, ugly, ghastly people

Dubai is alright if you don't mind remortgaging to pay for a round of drinks.

At least you don't get the usual suspects of pissed up Brits (or Germans or Russians) causing trouble of an evening.

Plus, there seems to be ****ing fantastic Lebanese restaurants everywhere.

[IUFG]

Now that you're a seasoned traveller, you could try somewhere really exotic next year, like Magaluf.

A good night out is Magaluf.

Well it was 30 years ago (nearly).

Sun, E's, Karting track, cheap booze, even cheaper girls. What was not to like?