his Lacazette home shirt complete with name and number has just arrived. Thankfully, he has assured me that he will wear it only while playing football or around the house, so not down the pub with me at lunch hour.

He's also just told me that he ordered it from an 'unofficial' website and paid a mere £30 instead of the £80 the club's official site was asking.

Basically, he's stealing money from our club, isn't he?