Impressive sportsmen/celebrities you have met.

[SWv2]

Did I tell you I've got jury service in August? Croydon Crown Court. How the fúck am I supposed to schlepp to Croydon every day? Apart from anything else, parking is a fúcking nightmare.

What a lot of old bóllocks.

Just offer an excuse or reason for non-attendance and they will accept it.

They invite multiples of the numbers required as they know people have **** to be getting on with.

[Ganpati's Goonerz--AFC's Aboriginal Fertility Cult]

Patrick Vieira
Gilles Grimandi
Ray Houghton
Alvin Martin
Rolf Harris
Gary Numan

Compete with that little lot.

My brother met Ian Wright in the Croydon KFC.

[Ganpati's Goonerz--AFC's Aboriginal Fertility Cult]

My brother met Ian Wright in the Croydon KFC.

Oh, and my missus met the Dalai Lama - filmed an audience he was having with the British lady who runs a charity up that way who my missus was making a film for. And got presented with an award by Jon Snow.

Closest I've got is having spoken to two of the country's top experts on WW1 - Mombauer on the causes, Sheffield on the fighting. And I met a Congress state MP (MLA) in India. Not very good, is it?

[Just Trent]

Patrick Vieira
Gilles Grimandi
Ray Houghton
Alvin Martin
Rolf Harris
Gary Numan

Compete with that little lot.

Dave Grohl
Dennis Bergkamp
Ian Wright
Tony Hart
One of the chaps from Aswad.

[Pokster]

Dave Grohl
Dennis Bergkamp
Ian Wright
Tony Hart
One of the chaps from Aswad.

Forgot to add Eric Cantona and also Monsour Barhami.....