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Thread: Talking of snobby spastic, I'm going for lunch tomorrow with several friends and

  1. #1

    Talking of snobby spastic, I'm going for lunch tomorrow with several friends and

    family members to celebrate the birthday of the glw. We are going to a rather nice seafood restaurant in Brighton.

    A visit to a seafood restaurant means certain things to me. It means foaming tankards of black velvet, half a dozen natives and then lobsters or Dover Soles. It does not mean fillets of sea bass or pan-fried cod or any other standard fish dish I could cook for myself any day of the week. However, if I order what I would like, when it comes to splitting the bill, the majority of those present will shít themselves.

    What should I do, Awimb? Compromise my beliefs and eat ordinary people's food? That would be dishonest. Insist on paying for everyone? That would be humiliating for the other gentlemen present. Just get on with it in a cheery spirit of 'fúck you'?

  2. #2
    Quote Originally Posted by Sir C View Post
    family members to celebrate the birthday of the glw. We are going to a rather nice seafood restaurant in Brighton.

    A visit to a seafood restaurant means certain things to me. It means foaming tankards of black velvet, half a dozen natives and then lobsters or Dover Soles. It does not mean fillets of sea bass or pan-fried cod or any other standard fish dish I could cook for myself any day of the week. However, if I order what I would like, when it comes to splitting the bill, the majority of those present will shít themselves.

    What should I do, Awimb? Compromise my beliefs and eat ordinary people's food? That would be dishonest. Insist on paying for everyone? That would be humiliating for the other gentlemen present. Just get on with it in a cheery spirit of 'fúck you'?
    Just offer to pay more on the split.

  3. #3
    Senior Member IUFG's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sir C View Post
    family members to celebrate the birthday of the glw. We are going to a rather nice seafood restaurant in Brighton...
    order what you like and offer to pay extra at the end. The others will be too polite to take you up on the offer.

    You offered, they declined, everyone's a winner imo.
    “Other clubs never came into my thoughts once I knew Arsenal wanted to sign me.”

  4. #4
    Quote Originally Posted by IUFG View Post
    order what you like and offer to pay extra at the end. The others will be too polite to take you up on the offer.

    You offered, they declined, everyone's a winner imo.
    You know not of whom you speak, i.

    This is probably the best plan though, thank you.

  5. #5
    Quote Originally Posted by Ash View Post
    Just offer to pay more on the split.
    I wouldn't be in danger of sounding a little condescending?

  6. #6
    Quote Originally Posted by Sir C View Post
    family members to celebrate the birthday of the glw. We are going to a rather nice seafood restaurant in Brighton.

    A visit to a seafood restaurant means certain things to me. It means foaming tankards of black velvet, half a dozen natives and then lobsters or Dover Soles. It does not mean fillets of sea bass or pan-fried cod or any other standard fish dish I could cook for myself any day of the week. However, if I order what I would like, when it comes to splitting the bill, the majority of those present will shít themselves.

    What should I do, Awimb? Compromise my beliefs and eat ordinary people's food? That would be dishonest. Insist on paying for everyone? That would be humiliating for the other gentlemen present. Just get on with it in a cheery spirit of 'fúck you'?
    3-5 pints before meeting up will do the trick.

  7. #7
    Quote Originally Posted by Sir C View Post
    I wouldn't be in danger of sounding a little condescending?
    I think it is fairest to give them the option of whether they want to buy half your dinner or not. If they have a problem with that option than .. um ... that's their problem.

    It might just encourage them to join you in top-end choices then everyone's happy.

  8. #8
    Quote Originally Posted by Sir C View Post
    I wouldn't be in danger of sounding a little condescending?
    a cheery spirit of 'fúck you' is the only polite way to do it.

    Or suggest when the bill comes that everyone just pays for what they had and the waiter can go to everyone separately. They would love that

  9. #9
    Senior Member IUFG's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SWv2 View Post
    3-5 pints before meeting up will do the trick.
    sound advice, as always, from sw here, sc.
    “Other clubs never came into my thoughts once I knew Arsenal wanted to sign me.”

  10. #10
    Quote Originally Posted by SWv2 View Post
    3-5 pints before meeting up will do the trick.
    Hmm. Imbibing excessively prior to meeting for lunch is potentially problematic, sw. There is a danger that one may become bemused, muddled or confused, and the possibility exists that one might behave less than impeccably - even, God help us, rudely.

    An English gentleman never runs the risk of being rude, sw. You understand that, of co.....

    Oh. Sorry. As you were. Back to your shamrock carving or spud picking. There's nothing to see here.

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