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Thread: A woman has left a screaming baby with me under the instructions that I must keep it

  1. #1

    A woman has left a screaming baby with me under the instructions that I must keep it

    alive for the next four hours. Apparently the fact that said baby is technically my daughter should mean I take on this responsibility uncomplainingly.

    I do not recall signing up for this sh*t

  2. #2
    Quote Originally Posted by Monty92 View Post
    alive for the next four hours. Apparently the fact that said baby is technically my daughter should mean I take on this responsibility uncomplainingly.

    I do not recall signing up for this sh*t
    I go on parental leave in February. He's still a whiny little **** at the moment so i hope there's some progress in the next two months.

  3. #3
    Quote Originally Posted by Billy Goat Sverige View Post
    I go on parental leave in February. He's still a whiny little **** at the moment so i hope there's some progress in the next two months.
    how old is he?

  4. #4
    Quote Originally Posted by Monty92 View Post
    how old is he?
    Just turned one. He's in that crawl/climbing phase and has a new bruise on his head at least once a week. Starting to get worried they think we're child abusers

  5. #5
    Quote Originally Posted by Billy Goat Sverige View Post
    I go on parental leave in February. He's still a whiny little **** at the moment so i hope there's some progress in the next two months.
    Is this new / additional parental leave or did you just not bother when the kid was born?

    I am aware you Scandi types have very progressive ways of doing these things.

  6. #6
    Quote Originally Posted by SWv2 View Post
    Is this new / additional parental leave or did you just not bother when the kid was born?

    I am aware you Scandi types have very progressive ways of doing these things.
    As if encouraging fathers to stay at home with their baby is in any way "progressive".

    Saying that, I just managed to get mine to sleep, and as it screamed in my face I was only fleetingly tempted to stab it in the throat :competentdad:

  7. #7
    Quote Originally Posted by Monty92 View Post
    As if encouraging fathers to stay at home with their baby is in any way "progressive".
    Wait until you have to do a really messy nappy and get all of the crap out of her little lady bits


    Good noncing opportunity for the likes of you though M!

  8. #8
    Quote Originally Posted by Monty92 View Post
    As if encouraging fathers to stay at home with their baby is in any way "progressive".

    Saying that, I just managed to get mine to sleep, and as it screamed in my face I was only fleetingly tempted to stab it in the throat :competentdad:
    My eldest threw her teddy at a glass of milk I was holding for her, went all over me. I took one look at her and chucked the rest over her.......there was quite a lot more milk in the glass than I'd thought :baddad:

  9. #9
    Quote Originally Posted by SWv2 View Post
    Is this new / additional parental leave or did you just not bother when the kid was born?

    I am aware you Scandi types have very progressive ways of doing these things.
    Didn't bother when he was born. My girlfriend took 14 months and will save some days and i've got 60 days paid to use so i might spread them out over 4-6 months. I'll use three or four days a week.

  10. #10
    Quote Originally Posted by Monty92 View Post
    alive for the next four hours. Apparently the fact that said baby is technically my daughter should mean I take on this responsibility uncomplainingly.

    I do not recall signing up for this sh*t

    Do you know this woman. It would be a bit disappointing if you did?
    "Scoring a goal is better than sex" - Whoever said that was sticking it to the wrong woman

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