I am currently sat at my desk imagining Danny Rose's face over and over again

[World's End Stella]

but nope, just can't do it, Charles.

I understand our Welsh midfield genius played centrally last night, in the Ozil role. No doubt he was brilliant and with him pulling the strings we created chance after chance after chance.

Yes?

[Sir C]

but nope, just can't do it, Charles.

I understand our Welsh midfield genius played centrally last night, in the Ozil role. No doubt he was brilliant and with him pulling the strings we created chance after chance after chance.

Yes?

I'm back at my desk after almost a week off sick. I feel as rough as old mince. I'm shivering, I have a ******* behind the eyes, my throat has been sandpapered and I can hear the phlegm bubbling in my chest when I inhale.

In short, league cup, meh, your obsession with Aaron, meh, life, meh.

[Burney]

I'm back at my desk after almost a week off sick. I feel as rough as old mince. I'm shivering, I have a ******* behind the eyes, my throat has been sandpapered and I can hear the phlegm bubbling in my chest when I inhale.

Well I don't know about anyone else, but I'm definitely turned on.

[Sir C]

Well I don't know about anyone else, but I'm definitely turned on.

Have you read Simon Jenkins this morning? You'll shít yourself in amazement.

[World's End Stella]

I'm back at my desk after almost a week off sick. I feel as rough as old mince. I'm shivering, I have a ******* behind the eyes, my throat has been sandpapered and I can hear the phlegm bubbling in my chest when I inhale.

In short, league cup, meh, your obsession with Aaron, meh, life, meh.

So pretty much everything, meh.

A sound approach, I must say. I might try that instead of Danny Rose's face.

[71 Guns - channeling the spirit of Mr Hat]

I'm back at my desk after almost a week off sick. I feel as rough as old mince. I'm shivering, I have a ******* behind the eyes, my throat has been sandpapered and I can hear the phlegm bubbling in my chest when I inhale.

In short, league cup, meh, your obsession with Aaron, meh, life, meh.

It's a fùcking horrible bug, to be sure. I've barely been outside the house for a week and am continuously gobbing up voluminous globules of luminescent gunk. I'm on roids and anti-biotics and am as miserable as sin. Thank god for the Arsenal, eh? Oh...

[Burney]

Have you read Simon Jenkins this morning? You'll shít yourself in amazement.

I did. Remarkable stuff. Even Owen Jones talked something approaching sense this morning seems to be getting it with regard to immigration. The world is truly changing.

[Sir C]

It's a fùcking horrible bug, to be sure. I've barely been outside the house for a week and am continuously gobbing up voluminous globules of luminescent gunk. I'm on roids and anti-biotics and am as miserable as sin. Thank god for the Arsenal, eh? Oh...

Anabolic steroids? Hemorrhoids?

[71 Guns - channeling the spirit of Mr Hat]

Anabolic steroids? Hemorrhoids?

Whatever it is I got off da internetz when I googled 'how to kill man-flu' without paying excessive prescription charges. They taste funny.

[Sir C]

Whatever it is I got off da internetz when I googled 'how to kill man-flu' without paying excessive prescription charges. They taste funny.

Back in the day I would have self-medicated with some proper drugs. A couple of decent lines is enough to put anyone back on their feet for 3 or 4 hours in an emergency.

Sadly, I suspect that these days such a strategy woiuld kill me.