So I have returned from India with my bowels in full working order

:cloud9: Ave some of that, Dutchie.

India - what a f*cking dump. Can Indians not actually plan anything? Every part of it seems to have grown organically and as a result you get a load of building sites, some rubbish others not, surrounded by a load of shanty shops, some rubbish, others not. Garbage everywhere, traffic everywhere, pollution everywhere. What a dump.

Lovely people all right, they seem very happy and genuine. Although how anyone can be happy living in that dump is beyond me, and quite why anyone would ever want to visit it given how many other wonderfully interesting and civilized parts of the world there are I will never understand.

Having said that, I quite enjoyed my trip and will look forward to returning to see the lovely people. India, less so.

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Originally Posted by World's End Stella

:cloud9: Ave some of that, Dutchie.

India - what a f*cking dump. Can Indians not actually plan anything? Every part of it seems to have grown organically and as a result you get a load of building sites, some rubbish others not, surrounded by a load of shanty shops, some rubbish, others not. Garbage everywhere, traffic everywhere, pollution everywhere. What a dump.

Lovely people all right, they seem very happy and genuine. Although how anyone can be happy living in that dump is beyond me, and quite why anyone would ever want to visit it given how many other wonderfully interesting and civilized parts of the world there are I will never understand.

Having said that, I quite enjoyed my trip and will look forward to returning to see the lovely people. India, less so.

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It is a ****hole, but an interesting one.

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Originally Posted by World's End Stella

:cloud9: Ave some of that, Dutchie.

India - what a f*cking dump. Can Indians not actually plan anything? Every part of it seems to have grown organically and as a result you get a load of building sites, some rubbish others not, surrounded by a load of shanty shops, some rubbish, others not. Garbage everywhere, traffic everywhere, pollution everywhere. What a dump.

Lovely people all right, they seem very happy and genuine. Although how anyone can be happy living in that dump is beyond me, and quite why anyone would ever want to visit it given how many other wonderfully interesting and civilized parts of the world there are I will never understand.

Having said that, I quite enjoyed my trip and will look forward to returning to see the lovely people. India, less so.

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Yes, you're absolutely right, the sub-continent is an absolute dump and identifying this shows what a very special person you are. Congratulations.

Now I thought you said you were going to fúck off to Spurs?

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Originally Posted by Sir C

Yes, you're absolutely right, the sub-continent is an absolute dump and identifying this shows what a very special person you are. Congratulations.

Now I thought you said you were going to fúck off to Spurs?

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Expressing an opinion makes someone special in your world? Actually, that explains quite a lot you strange, little Dutchie man.

My Spurs flirtation is investigatory at this point, only. This Saturday will be confusing, I must admit. :-(

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Originally Posted by Sir C

Yes, you're absolutely right, the sub-continent is an absolute dump and identifying this shows what a very special person you are. Congratulations.

Now I thought you said you were going to fúck off to Spurs?

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Do you mean "special" :rubchin: ?

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Originally Posted by World's End Stella

:cloud9: Ave some of that, Dutchie.

India - what a f*cking dump. Can Indians not actually plan anything? Every part of it seems to have grown organically and as a result you get a load of building sites, some rubbish others not, surrounded by a load of shanty shops, some rubbish, others not. Garbage everywhere, traffic everywhere, pollution everywhere. What a dump.

Lovely people all right, they seem very happy and genuine. Although how anyone can be happy living in that dump is beyond me, and quite why anyone would ever want to visit it given how many other wonderfully interesting and civilized parts of the world there are I will never understand.

Having said that, I quite enjoyed my trip and will look forward to returning to see the lovely people. India, less so.

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Sounds like you ended up in one of the big cities?

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Originally Posted by Alberto Balsam Rodriguez

Sounds like you ended up in one of the big cities?

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Two. Bombay and Bengaluru - both sh1tholes.

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Originally Posted by World's End Stella

Two. Bombay and Bengaluru - both sh1tholes.

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I stayed in a quite charming hotel called The Leela Palace in Bangalore, actually.

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Originally Posted by World's End Stella

Two. Bombay and Bengaluru - both sh1tholes.

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And your list of more beautiful stations than VT includes? Kipling's dad did the carvings on the inside.

But India is the Indians. Anyone who doesn't get it has no soul. Go and hang out with some sadhus or street kids. **** sight more fun that this backward little island. Can't wait to get back.

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Originally Posted by Ganpati's Goonerz--AFC's Aboriginal Fertility Cult

And your list of more beautiful stations than VT includes? Kipling's dad did the carvings on the inside.

But India is the Indians. Anyone who doesn't get it has no soul. Go and hang out with some sadhus or street kids. **** sight more fun that this backward little island. Can't wait to get back.

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He favours 'resorts' in the UAE :shrug:

Point of order though, just because we have an ignorant chav class (including immigrant Canadians) who are as thick as pigshít, describing 'this island' as 'backward' seems harsh.

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Originally Posted by Sir C

He favours 'resorts' in the UAE :shrug:

Point of order though, just because we have an ignorant chav class (including immigrant Canadians) who are as thick as pigshít, describing 'this island' as 'backward' seems harsh.

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Also, I'm not sure that suggesting those whose only refuge from the relentless ghastliness of everyday life is a sort of stoic/ascetic mysticism or children consigned to grinding poverty as exemplars of all that's best about India is exactly convincing me of its merits, either.

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Originally Posted by Ganpati's Goonerz--AFC's Aboriginal Fertility Cult

And your list of more beautiful stations than VT includes? Kipling's dad did the carvings on the inside.

But India is the Indians. Anyone who doesn't get it has no soul. Go and hang out with some sadhus or street kids. **** sight more fun that this backward little island. Can't wait to get back.

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No Irish bars then?

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Originally Posted by SWv2

No Irish bars then?

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Talking of which, they're opening a new Crikey O'Reilly's near me, sw. It's called 'The Quiet Man' :hehe:

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Originally Posted by Burney

Talking of which, they're opening a new Crikey O'Reilly's near me, sw. It's called 'The Quiet Man' :hehe:

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Fúck me, I don't think there is even a Quiet Man pub in Cong which at least could be used to fleece half pint caressing Americans.

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Originally Posted by SWv2

Fúck me, I don't think there is even a Quiet Man pub in Cong which at least could be used to fleece half pint caressing Americans.

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I was in one in Alicante a few weeks back for the Wales game.Dublin fella owned it.He sat at the bar all night insulting every customer he could,so it felt homely.

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Originally Posted by TheCurly

I was in one in Alicante a few weeks back for the Wales game.Dublin fella owned it.He sat at the bar all night insulting every customer he could,so it felt homely.

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Look at you with your wee bit of winter sun.

Far from winter sun you were reared.

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Originally Posted by SWv2

Look at you with your wee bit of winter sun.

Far from winter sun you were reared.

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27 degrees in October.wd the credit union

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Originally Posted by SWv2

Look at you with your wee bit of winter sun.

Far from winter sun you were reared.

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Oh and don't tell Sir C i use a credit union.He thinks they're all communists to a man

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Originally Posted by TheCurly

Oh and don't tell Sir C i use a credit union.He thinks they're all communists to a man

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Probably a member of Limerick CU the same man.

Him and his bike stealing relatives.

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Originally Posted by Burney

Also, I'm not sure that suggesting those whose only refuge from the relentless ghastliness of everyday life is a sort of stoic/ascetic mysticism or children consigned to grinding poverty as exemplars of all that's best about India is exactly convincing me of its merits, either.

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Its a pretty ****ing horrible place by most measures. Gut wrenching poverty to the point of starvation set against a backdrop of obscene wealth and the veiled notion that it is all our fault.

WES has been to Bangalore which in my experience is about the best place to visit.

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Originally Posted by Peter

Its a pretty ****ing horrible place by most measures. Gut wrenching poverty to the point of starvation set against a backdrop of obscene wealth and the veiled notion that it is all our fault.

WES has been to Bangalore which in my experience is about the best place to visit.

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Listen to Judith fúcking Chalmers here.

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Originally Posted by SWv2

Listen to Judith fúcking Chalmers here.

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What are you going on about now?

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Originally Posted by Peter

What are you going on about now?

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Don't try to bully me pal.

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Originally Posted by Peter

Its a pretty ****ing horrible place by most measures. Gut wrenching poverty to the point of starvation set against a backdrop of obscene wealth and the veiled notion that it is all our fault.

WES has been to Bangalore which in my experience is about the best place to visit.

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Is it 'horrible', or simply 'different'?

Habitual street crápping aside, it's surely generally more fascinating than horrible?

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Originally Posted by Peter

Its a pretty ****ing horrible place by most measures. Gut wrenching poverty to the point of starvation set against a backdrop of obscene wealth and the veiled notion that it is all our fault.

WES has been to Bangalore which in my experience is about the best place to visit.

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Oh, I had to take issue with a bolshie Indian bird the other day who was blathering on about my colonial privilege and how it was only right that 'white men' be made to pay for the sins of empire. I pointed out that my ancestors were starved and oppressed by the Brits quite as much as hers and you don't hear me moaning about it. She said that was because, as a white man, I was still benefitting from imperialism. I pointed out that, as the child of a rich, English-speaking Indian family who was earning a very nice living in England by writing stuff in English, so was she.

After about an hour of back-and-forth, we agreed to differ.

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Originally Posted by Sir C

Is it 'horrible', or simply 'different'?

Habitual street crápping aside, it's surely generally more fascinating than horrible?

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I put it to you that you would be less willing to overlook the grinding poverty, dead kids, street cràpping, etc in a less 'exotic' locale.

Are you not indulging in the soft bigotry of low expectations here?

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Originally Posted by Sir C

Is it 'horrible', or simply 'different'?

Habitual street crápping aside, it's surely generally more fascinating than horrible?

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Shítting in the street isn't cool.

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Originally Posted by Burney

I put it to you that you would be less willing to overlook the grinding poverty, dead kids, street cràpping, etc in a less 'exotic' locale.

Are you not indulging in the soft bigotry of low expectations here?

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Eh? What utter fúcktardery is this now? We're not talking about Croydon now, old chap. India is a more 'exotic' locale. Things are different. That's not to say that there aren't shítholes to be seen; I've been in duty, shítty burgs all over the third world thinking 'what the fúck am I doing here?' but scratching the surface of such environments inevitably (often?) broadens the mind, brings one closer to a true comprehension of the universe and soothes the aching chakras.

That, in fact, is your issue. Your chakras are fúcked.

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Originally Posted by SWv2

Don't try to bully me pal.

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Did you have a point you wished to make?

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Originally Posted by Sir C

Eh? What utter fúcktardery is this now? We're not talking about Croydon now, old chap. India is a more 'exotic' locale. Things are different. That's not to say that there aren't shítholes to be seen; I've been in duty, shítty burgs all over the third world thinking 'what the fúck am I doing here?' but scratching the surface of such environments inevitably (often?) broadens the mind, brings one closer to a true comprehension of the universe and soothes the aching chakras.

That, in fact, is your issue. Your chakras are fúcked.

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Yes, but I do wonder if our somewhat mystical, exoticised view of the place means we let Johnny Indian off the hook a bit for the utter fücking state of the place. Oughtn't we to be saying that perhaps he ought to think a bit less about his chakras and a bit more about not taking a dump in the street?

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Originally Posted by Burney

Oh, I had to take issue with a bolshie Indian bird the other day who was blathering on about my colonial privilege and how it was only right that 'white men' be made to pay for the sins of empire. I pointed out that my ancestors were starved and oppressed by the Brits quite as much as hers and you don't hear me moaning about it. She said that was because, as a white man, I was still benefitting from imperialism. I pointed out that, as the child of a rich, English-speaking Indian family who was earning a very nice living in England by writing stuff in English, so was she.

After about an hour of back-and-forth, we agreed to differ.

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70 years of independence and they seem to have made the place worse.

Also, it is just too bloody hot. I can cope in the South where it is a bit wetter but the heat in Delhi in unbearable.

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Originally Posted by Burney

Yes, but I do wonder if our somewhat mystical, exoticised view of the place means we let Johnny Indian off the hook a bit for the utter fücking state of the place. Oughtn't we to be saying that perhaps he ought to think a bit less about his chakras and a bit more about not taking a dump in the street?

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Street shítting is a cultural oddity and is something that the Indian government and vast swathes of the population are actually addressing now. On the other hand I'm not sure we ought to be saying anything about it. If Johnny Indian wants to shít in the street and consider his chakras, who the hell are we to tell him what to do?

None of which is relevant to my point, which is that 'different' does not mean the same as 'wrong. I find these places where things are 'different' interesting. This, apparently, makes me weird.

Could I make you happy by only going on holiday to Magaluf and only eating in English restaurants?

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Originally Posted by Peter

70 years of independence and they seem to have made the place worse.

Also, it is just too bloody hot. I can cope in the South where it is a bit wetter but the heat in Delhi in unbearable.

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At one point, she appeared to be trying to blame us for the fact that, as a society, it is one of the most profoundly corrupt on earth. I pointed out that that was pretty much entirely down to them. She claimed that our colonialism had infantilised the Indian character to a point where no-one could possibly expect them not to rob each other blind. :rolleyes:

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Originally Posted by Sir C

Street shítting is a cultural oddity and is something that the Indian government and vast swathes of the population are actually addressing now. On the other hand I'm not sure we ought to be saying anything about it. If Johnny Indian wants to shít in the street and consider his chakras, who the hell are we to tell him what to do?

None of which is relevant to my point, which is that 'different' does not mean the same as 'wrong. I find these places where things are 'different' interesting. This, apparently, makes me weird.

Could I make you happy by only going on holiday to Magaluf and only eating in English restaurants?

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Who are we to tell him what to do?! We're Englishmen, dammit! And, as such, his betters.

Pinko talk like that is exactly the sort of thing that lost us the empire.

I'm starting to have my doubts about you :-(

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Originally Posted by Sir C

Street shítting is a cultural oddity and is something that the Indian government and vast swathes of the population are actually addressing now. On the other hand I'm not sure we ought to be saying anything about it. If Johnny Indian wants to shít in the street and consider his chakras, who the hell are we to tell him what to do?

None of which is relevant to my point, which is that 'different' does not mean the same as 'wrong. I find these places where things are 'different' interesting. This, apparently, makes me weird.

Could I make you happy by only going on holiday to Magaluf and only eating in English restaurants?

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Far be it from me to judge any man but I am not sure one can just dismiss, or excuse perhaps, the concept of street shítting as a "cultural oddity".

Can they not carry little bags like dog owners*?



*dirty bástárds

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Originally Posted by Burney

At one point, she appeared to be trying to blame us for the fact that, as a society, it is one of the most profoundly corrupt on earth. I pointed out that that was pretty much entirely down to them. She claimed that our colonialism had infantilised the Indian character to a point where no-one could possibly expect them not to rob each other blind. :rolleyes:

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Fascinating isn't it. They can make anything fit the same pattern but it ultimately comes down to the same point- a reluctance or outright inability to assume responsibility for anything or to accept accountability for it. Everything, including one's own mistakes, are actually somebody else's fault.

Its the modern day religion.

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Originally Posted by SWv2

Fúck me, I don't think there is even a Quiet Man pub in Cong which at least could be used to fleece half pint caressing Americans.

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I was in Cong last year SW...place has gone full on Quiet Man since i was last there only a few years back..sad seens

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Originally Posted by Burney

Who are we to tell him what to do?! We're Englishmen, dammit! And, as such, his betters.

Pinko talk like that is exactly the sort of thing that lost us the empire.

I'm starting to have my doubts about you :-(

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You can **** in the street but you cant have a fag afterwards. That is a country that has its legislative agenda slightly arse about face.

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Originally Posted by Peter

Fascinating isn't it. They can make anything fit the same pattern but it ultimately comes down to the same point- a reluctance or outright inability to assume responsibility for anything or to accept accountability for it. Everything, including one's own mistakes, are actually somebody else's fault.

Its the modern day religion.

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Basically, her point boiled down to the fact that she felt entitled to exploit us and deride us because her ancestors had suffered colonial oppression, but that despite my ancestors also having suffered colonial oppression, I was excluded from doing so because I was white.

This seemed both unfair to me and - dare I say it - not a little racist. :-(

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Originally Posted by Peter

You can **** in the street but you cant have a fag afterwards. That is a country that has its legislative agenda slightly arse about face.

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Quite literally imo.