Now I don't really care about James Bond films as they're really stupid, but

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08-10-2018, 08:37 AM
Burney

Now I don't really care about James Bond films as they're really stupid, but

Idris Elba being made the new James Bond would strike me as a fairly major 'fúck you' to the sort of people who are.

Apart from anything else, surely Hollywood must have noticed by now that this sort of 'woke' stunt casting is not exactly box office dynamite?
08-10-2018, 08:43 AM
Luis Anaconda

Quote:

Originally Posted by Burney

Idris Elba being made the new James Bond would strike me as a fairly major 'fúck you' to the sort of people who are.

Apart from anything else, surely Hollywood must have noticed by now that this sort of 'woke' stunt casting is not exactly box office dynamite?

That's all very well and all that (and given they haven't even started filming the "last" Daniel Craig one and Eon, with whom I have done some work in the past, are notoriously slow to make any decisions, I doubt this is anything more than groundless gossip), but what's the weather like over there?
08-10-2018, 08:47 AM
Burney

Quote:

Originally Posted by Luis Anaconda

That's all very well and all that (and given they haven't even started filming the "last" Daniel Craig one and Eon, with whom I have done some work in the past, are notoriously slow to make any decisions, I doubt this is anything more than groundless gossip), but what's the weather like over there?

Oh, I know. I'm just musing on the rumour, really. It just seems to me that messing about with a 65 year-old canon to pander to some silly idea of diversity is a fairly risky move.

It's fine and clear, la. 4 day test match ahoy!
08-10-2018, 08:51 AM
Luis Anaconda

Quote:

Originally Posted by Burney

Oh, I know. I'm just musing on the rumour, really. It just seems to me that messing about with a 65 year-old canon to pander to some silly idea of diversity is a fairly risky move.

It's fine and clear, la. 4 day test match ahoy!

Of course, thing is they also aren't stupid - they'll only pander to some silly idea of diversity if they think it will make them more money, which as you say is unlikely. Just paying lip service to the idea keeps them in the news between films (see also Colin Salmon rumours pre/post-Brosnan.

Excellent news on the weather - now to to win the toss
Excellent
08-10-2018, 08:59 AM
Burney

Quote:

Originally Posted by Luis Anaconda

Of course, thing is they also aren't stupid - they'll only pander to some silly idea of diversity if they think it will make them more money, which as you say is unlikely. Just paying lip service to the idea keeps them in the news between films (see also Colin Salmon rumours pre/post-Brosnan.

Excellent news on the weather - now to to win the toss
Excellent

That is my assumption, too. Apart from anything else, Elba's likely to be about 50 by the time a new Bond film appears. Assuming he were to sign on for 5 to 10 years, he'd be getting on for Roger Moore in View To A Kill levels of oldness.

However, Hollywood has done some pretty stupid stuff. All-female Ghostbusters 2, anyone?
08-10-2018, 09:03 AM
Ash

Quote:

Originally Posted by Burney

It's fine and clear, la. 4 day test match ahoy!

Rain at eleven.

Three day test.
08-10-2018, 09:03 AM
Herbert Augustus Chapman

You really are the most frightful old gammon b. I don't think they've gone far

Quote:

Originally Posted by Burney

Idris Elba being made the new James Bond would strike me as a fairly major 'fúck you' to the sort of people who are.

Apart from anything else, surely Hollywood must have noticed by now that this sort of 'woke' stunt casting is not exactly box office dynamite?

enough. It's time James Bond was a fat black lesbian woman in a wheelchair. I would have said jewish too but then every ****'d hate her.
08-10-2018, 09:06 AM
Luis Anaconda

Quote:

Originally Posted by Burney

That is my assumption, too. Apart from anything else, Elba's likely to be about 50 by the time a new Bond film appears. Assuming he were to sign on for 5 to 10 years, he'd be getting on for Roger Moore in View To A Kill levels of oldness.

However, Hollywood has done some pretty stupid stuff. All-female Ghostbusters 2, anyone?

5ft tall Tom Cruise as 6ft 5 Jack Reacher :( That annoys me more than anything
08-10-2018, 09:09 AM
Burney

Quote:

Originally Posted by Herbert Augustus Chapman

enough. It's time James Bond was a fat black lesbian woman in a wheelchair. I would have said jewish too but then every ****'d hate her.

How dare you, h? I am much more woke than you.

Personally, I think they should spraypaint Michelangelo's David brown (and give him a bigger cock); paint a burqa on Botticelli's Venus and produce a dub version of Beethoven's Eroica to replace the original.

That's how much all these manifestations of white 'culture' disgust me.
08-10-2018, 09:13 AM
Tony C

Vodka Martini replaces with a Dark N Stormy....quite partial to that drink too.

Kind of grateful they aren’t even thinking of the next double O being a woman.

Seems to be the hot trend right now...Female Ghostbusters, Female Oceans, Female Terminator and now I’m hearing they’ve even got a female Predator

https://www.themarysue.com/female-predator/

Yep she’s got some titties on her....or it...not sure how gender works with aliens imo
08-10-2018, 09:16 AM
Sir C

Quote:

Originally Posted by Burney

Idris Elba being made the new James Bond would strike me as a fairly major 'fúck you' to the sort of people who are.

Apart from anything else, surely Hollywood must have noticed by now that this sort of 'woke' stunt casting is not exactly box office dynamite?

There's no reason Bond shouldn't be black, though. There's no canonical thread that directly links Sean Connery to Daniel Craig other than a shared name and general theme. If we were to stick strictly to the terms of the books, Bond would be about 116.

Connery was identifiable as Fleming's Bond and the films were based on his writing. The films which followed Connery have been Bond in name only. His next incarnation could easily be black, Asian, female or a dog.
08-10-2018, 09:19 AM
Herbert Augustus Chapman

Quote:

Originally Posted by Burney

How dare you, h? I am much more woke than you.

Personally, I think they should spraypaint Michelangelo's David brown (and give him a bigger cock); paint a burqa on Botticelli's Venus and produce a dub version of Beethoven's Eroica to replace the original.

That's how much all these manifestations of white 'culture' disgust me.

Well that's a little better but why should it be a cock on David? What's wrong with an enormous great gaping fanny eh? Are you a misogynist b?
08-10-2018, 09:22 AM
7sisters

Ralph Fienes as the next Shaft ?

You’d think they’d have learned about the limits of adaptation with Idris following that comedy turd he served up on Sky recently.
08-10-2018, 09:25 AM
Luis Anaconda

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sir C

There's no reason Bond shouldn't be black, though. There's no canonical thread that directly links Sean Connery to Daniel Craig other than a shared name and general theme. If we were to stick strictly to the terms of the books, Bond would be about 116.

Connery was identifiable as Fleming's Bond and the films were based on his writing. The films which followed Connery have been Bond in name only. His next incarnation could easily be black, Asian, female or a dog.

Trouble is they have tried to link the character back to his origins (in particular in Skyfall), so it would be weird if he suddenly became black, while all the other characters remained the same. Though nothing to stop them completely changing direction as you say. Personally, I would go with a puma as JB - or a shark
08-10-2018, 09:25 AM
Burney

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sir C

There's no reason Bond shouldn't be black, though. There's no canonical thread that directly links Sean Connery to Daniel Craig other than a shared name and general theme. If we were to stick strictly to the terms of the books, Bond would be about 116.

Connery was identifiable as Fleming's Bond and the films were based on his writing. The films which followed Connery have been Bond in name only. His next incarnation could easily be black, Asian, female or a dog.

OK, let's ignore the canon and talk in terms of the brand. The (highly successful) brand is that he's a white, upper middle-class British man.

Also, he's called James, so him being a woman would be pretty weird.
08-10-2018, 09:28 AM
Burney

Quote:

Originally Posted by Luis Anaconda

Trouble is they have tried to link the character back to his origins (in particular in Skyfall), so it would be weird if he suddenly became black, while all the other characters remained the same. Though nothing to stop them completely changing direction as you say. Personally, I would go with a puma as JB - or a shark

A shark would be good. Although somewhat limiting in terms of story line. He'd only be able to foil the dastardly plots of Her Majesty's more sea-bound enemies.

On Her Majesty's Sea-creature Service?
08-10-2018, 09:30 AM
Luis Anaconda

Quote:

Originally Posted by Burney

A shark would be good. Although somewhat limiting in terms of story line. He'd only be able to foil the dastardly plots of Her Majesty's more sea-bound enemies.

On Her Majesty's Sea-creature Service?

Maybe with a whale as villain in View to A Krill?
08-10-2018, 09:31 AM
Burney

Quote:

Originally Posted by Luis Anaconda

Maybe with a whale as villain in View to A Krill?

Fishfinger?
08-10-2018, 09:32 AM
Burney

Quote:

Originally Posted by Burney

Fishfinger?

Octopuss...oh. :-(
08-10-2018, 09:32 AM
Sir C

Quote:

Originally Posted by Burney

OK, let's ignore the canon and talk in terms of the brand. The (highly successful) brand is that he's a white, upper middle-class British man.

Also, he's called James, so him being a woman would be pretty weird.

The brand is that he's an English (Scottish?) gentleman with impeccable taste and a decent line in running shooting punching driving and shiz. And he's cool.

He could easily be a she. Or Afro-Caribbean, or Anglo-Indian. It makes no difference now.
08-10-2018, 09:34 AM
redgunamo

Quote:

Originally Posted by Burney

OK, let's ignore the canon and talk in terms of the brand. The (highly successful) brand is that he's a white, upper middle-class British man.

Also, he's called James, so him being a woman would be pretty weird.

Ignoring the canon wouldn't do either, as that would defeat the whole point and object. Re-writing the canon, re-writing history itself is what it's all about.
08-10-2018, 09:34 AM
Sir C

Quote:

Originally Posted by Luis Anaconda

Trouble is they have tried to link the character back to his origins (in particular in Skyfall), so it would be weird if he suddenly became black, while all the other characters remained the same. Though nothing to stop them completely changing direction as you say. Personally, I would go with a puma as JB - or a shark

Well, yes, but they haven't taken him back to being a ruthless sex criminal who doesn't hesitate to torture women to achieve his goals, have they?

Bond hasn't been Bond since Connery, so, pfff.
08-10-2018, 09:34 AM
Burney

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sir C

The brand is that he's an English (Scottish?) gentleman with impeccable taste and a decent line in running shooting punching driving and shiz. And he's cool.

He could easily be a she. Or Afro-Caribbean, or Anglo-Indian. It makes no difference now.

Well in that case I think red should play him. At least he's not common.
08-10-2018, 09:35 AM
Sir C

Quote:

Originally Posted by Burney

Well in that case I think red should play him. At least he's not common.

red should play him as a white trans woman who identifies as a black lesbian.
08-10-2018, 09:36 AM
Herbert Augustus Chapman

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sir C

The brand is that he's an English (Scottish?) gentleman with impeccable taste and a decent line in running shooting punching driving and shiz. And he's cool.

He could easily be a she. Or Afro-Caribbean, or Anglo-Indian. It makes no difference now.

So you are, quite deliberately I feel, excluding disabled folk like me by saying he can't be in a wheelchair? For shame.
08-10-2018, 09:36 AM
Burney

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sir C

a ruthless sex criminal who doesn't hesitate to torture women to achieve his goals

You say that like it's a bad thing.
08-10-2018, 09:37 AM
Sir C

Quote:

Originally Posted by Burney

You say that like it's a bad thing.

:hehe: He's quite rapey in the books, inasmuch as he doesn't really take no for an answer, but continues to press his suit until swooning and compliance occurs.

Naughty jb #metoo
08-10-2018, 09:38 AM
Burney

Quote:

Originally Posted by redgunamo

Ignoring the canon wouldn't do either, as that would defeat the whole point and object. Re-writing the canon, re-writing history itself is what it's all about.

Well yes. We do seem to have decided to go a bit Year Zero on western civilisation don't we? I blame that stinking old fraud Gandhi.

Oh, well. We had a good run, I suppose.
08-10-2018, 09:39 AM
Luis Anaconda

Quote:

Originally Posted by Burney

Fishfinger?

Don't even need to change Octopussy - might make a much better film though

This is getting a kicking critically but I do quite want to see The Meg - Jason Statham v a prehistoric shark
http://www.themeg.movie
08-10-2018, 09:39 AM
Ash

If Bond can be 116 then why not explore earlier eras?

A Napoleonic Bond, perhaps, in From Prussia with Love.
08-10-2018, 09:40 AM
Luis Anaconda

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sir C

Well, yes, but they haven't taken him back to being a ruthless sex criminal who doesn't hesitate to torture women to achieve his goals, have they?

Bond hasn't been Bond since Connery, so, pfff.

You can't have everything
08-10-2018, 09:42 AM
Sir C

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ash

If Bond can be 116 then why not explore earlier eras?

A Napoleonic Bond, perhaps, in From Prussia with Love.

I like it, I like it. Also, why do we have to see him from a western perspective? How about a Buddhist Bond in You Only Live 3,678 Times.
08-10-2018, 09:46 AM
Burney

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sir C

I like it, I like it. Also, why do we have to see him from a western perspective? How about a Buddhist Bond in You Only Live 3,678 Times.

A Bond with better sexual etiquette in Dr No Means No?
08-10-2018, 09:52 AM
Ash

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sir C

I like it, I like it. Also, why do we have to see him from a western perspective? How about a Buddhist Bond in You Only Live 3,678 Times.

:hehe:

Thor could be the villain in Thunderbolt.
08-10-2018, 09:57 AM
Tony C

https://youtu.be/9RRhhewFqyw
08-10-2018, 09:58 AM
Luis Anaconda

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ash

:hehe:

Thor could be the villain in Thunderbolt.

I would definitely watch the Man With the Golden Gnu
08-10-2018, 10:33 AM
redgunamo

Quote:

Originally Posted by Burney

Idris Elba being made the new James Bond would strike me as a fairly major 'fúck you' to the sort of people who are.

Apart from anything else, surely Hollywood must have noticed by now that this sort of 'woke' stunt casting is not exactly box office dynamite?

Actually, Bond is the topic of today's wine quiz question: Which brand of champagne does he mostly prefer. He started with Dom, I think, in the early days. Then changed to Bolly.
08-10-2018, 10:43 AM
Burney

Quote:

Originally Posted by redgunamo

Actually, Bond is the topic of today's wine quiz question: Which brand of champagne does he mostly prefer. He started with Dom, I think, in the early days. Then changed to Bolly.

https://www.decanter.com/wine-news/o...-drink-279823/
08-10-2018, 10:45 AM
Viva Prat Vegas

We can't have Red as Bond
He's far too suave for the role

Mind you , the franchise was way ahead of the curve when Felix Leiter turned black for Live And Let Die in '73
08-10-2018, 10:52 AM
Burney

Quote:

Originally Posted by Viva Prat Vegas

We can't have Red as Bond
He's far too suave for the role

Mind you , the franchise was way ahead of the curve when Felix Leiter turned black for Live And Let Die in '73

I think Live and Let Die is the only one I've seen all the way through. Not from start to finish, but I think I've absorbed it all over the years. It's the one with all the voodoo, isn't it?

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