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Such a persistent and distinctive stain as well. :-(

These people must be on a constant hair-trigger, mustn't they? It would take me a lot longer than the duration of an escalator journey to achieve...

I can see how that could happen. It does have a nasty habit of getting everywhere, especially if you aren't able to contain it quickly.

Where do you meet all these victims, m? They're neurotic fantasists, you know.

Good heavens, f! Were you naked? If not, how did the emission make its way to the sofa?

Actually I also know a woman who was spaffed on as she was walking up an escalator on the tube. I can't help respecting a man so committed to his...

Anyone who has a sign saying that no tools are kept in their van overnight DEFINITELY has tools in their van overnight imo.

:hehe: not the same thing but I jizzed on someones sofa by accident once. I was sleeping on the sofa and had a wet dream. Which I've maybe had...

Robbery of builders tools, often from their van, is in fact a very lucrative black market business as they can easily be sold on within a very short...

:hehe: The obvious reaction to being splashed with a stranger's fluids - dance it off.

You have identified the real issue here. If I'm feeling a bit rapey, all I need do is momentarily identify as a woman and presto! The Carriage of the...

I'm remembering the one who did the interpretive dance because someone jizzed on her on the Tube. :hehe:

:hehe: but he's also used the word spectrum which I don't like.

Can I just say how much I like the phrase 'full-blown wànking'? :hehe:

This happened to me in Charing cross road. Nobody believes the story. this woman was walking down the road with her hand out and had a grab.

I got grabbed by the goolies by a girl when I was walking home in Camden from a club once. In fact I was mildly sexually assaulted only the other...

I wouldn't do it at an old school, mate. Or any school, for that matter.

I'm still very, old school on this and wear sunglasses everywhere

Surely the briefest of respectful and admiring glances is not wrong? Anyway, this whole subject reeks of cis-normative oppression. If a man feels...

Well apparently it's considered normal to get all rapey with them to be fashionable :shrug: In my day we had to make do with a crafty peek.

You're all sick, twisted individuals. Mind you, given the state of your mum's sexual peccadillos, it's no surprise you ended up a freak.

Quite and if they're pretty and in a short skirt or low-cut top then what exactly do they expect me to do???? :-p

You appear to have ignored the fact that my friend knocked one out in the footballing equivalent of Mecca.

Leering isn't sexual assault. It may be incredibly bad-mannered, but looking at someone isn't the same as assaulting them.

You committed an act of self-pollution on a 'mainly empty' bus, and you wonder why the world is fúcked up beyond any salvation? GOD HAS HAD ENOUGH OF...

--------------------------> :-| See that little picture? ^^^^ That's me not saying anything.

I have on a couple of occasions had my nuts grabbed on the tube by ladies. Was sort of Christmassy pissed up time

Sounds like a load of old bóllocks to me.

I shall admit that I did masturbate on public transport once. I was travelling from Peru to Bolivia on an overnight bus and was at the back, which...

Much the same with me, iPhone 5 died and thought I should probably get a 4G phone, so have the iPhone 7.